Hey, I'm Lara! Well I'm her about ten percent of the time anyway, and that's awesome!
Do I do the life story thing or not?
Oh, blow it! Yes.
I've been dressing for as long as I can remember, and throughout it all I've been ashamed, scared, and in terror of anyone finding out. As a child I was found out by my parents. They were as shocked and as scared as I. How could their boy be like this? How could he do this? I was made to throw all my feminine clothes away. After all, it was just a phase, surely?
But you can't turn this off and on like a light switch. It's part of me, who I was born to be, but I couldn't accept it. For years I dressed in secret. I tried everything to be 'normal', and the son my parents wanted, but I just became miserable, sullen, and lonely.
I existed like this for years.
I moved out into my own home but still I repressed my inner girl, until one day something happened to shake me up; A friend died. He was an awesome man, and he had lived a full and happy life with no regrets. I realised I needed to find out who I could be. It had taught me to not regret the past, to look to the future, and to see how you can change your life.
So I did...
Wow! Talk about falling down the rabbit hole. It was a massive step to take but I needed to be happy within myself and that meant not being ashamed anymore, allowing Lara to see the light of day.
So I went and had a makeover, Lara was truly born.
During the makeover I was told of a group
that could help me come to terms with who I was, and their meeting was the very
So I nervously put one foot in front of the other and took that difficult first step through my front door, then to the car, and the long, long drive with my nerves doing backflips.
I arrived a man in a room full of girls. They all smiled and said hello, and I relaxed. So I sat down and talked about me for the first time ever, and it was liberating. I've been to every evening since, and that was a year ago now. I've found myself, as him and as her, I've found that balance, and that's due to the folks I've met at the drab and dress.
There are trained professionals there, and Heather is an absolute legend, but I've found the most support comes from just sitting and talking with the other guys and gals about it all. As Lara I'm bold, outgoing and bubbly (ask Heather and she'll add that I'm too loud!) [Heather: No such thing as too loud, just rooms that are too small! xx]
As a man, I've found peace within. My best friend is from drab and I can't ask for a better group of friends than those I have met on my path to becoming Lara. I still have a wobble from time to time; Is this right? What are you doing, you silly boy? But with the support of the group I can talk and express myself in a completely understanding surrounding.
Lara is one year old with an amazing group of friends. Two years ago I would have never imagined that I would be this happy now.
I am me, and me is happy!
Thanks for reading.